September
27, 2000
Dear Dr. Irene,
I just wanted to say thanks for setting up your website.
I When I found it on my pc, It began a new chapter in my life. I read
everything on the website and even went and bought two of the verbal abuse
books that you recommended.
I was in a very verbally abusive relationship as the
victim for 5 years. After seeing your sight and reading the books, I
realized that my marriage was just like every example in the verbal abuse book. I spent years thinking that my
husband's anger was the fault of me and my children. I had no idea how
much it had affected us until after we left.
My husband knew he had a problem, but just refused to
get help or give up his controlling behavior. When I finally stood up and
told him that we would no longer be held responsible for his temper
tantrums and attacks, he asked us to leave. My eyes were opened for the
first time. I moved out, almost a year ago, and I feel so much better
about myself, having removed myself from the abuser.
Me and my kids no longer walk on egg shells and the kids
no longer suffer with bad grades in school. Also my youngest son has stopped
having daily migraines and diarrhea. My oldest son who had a drug and
drinking problem is now totally clean and has sworn off drinking. Wow!
As for my husband, he has already found a new girlfriend
to live with, and I hear she is unhealthy, dirty and unkempt. This tells
me a lot about her self esteem, and what my husband needs. It is easier
for him to pick someone with low self esteem than to pick someone that he
has to break down to his level. I haven't yet begun my divorce, but you
bet the grounds for divorce will be mental cruelty. Me and my boys have
suffered through years of being told we are worthless, and called the most
disgusting names in the book. We were constantly threatened with being
thrown out of our home if we didn't do exactly as my demanding husband said.
I wish I had found your site a long time before I did.
But, now we are all content and have peace in our home and feel free to be
ourselves. No more angry episodes or walking on egg shells We all feel
comfortable and secure in our new apartment. I am really dreading our
divorce because the kids will have to get on the witness stand and recall
all the nasty things that happened in our home, but I think it will help
us heal our wounds to get up and tell our story in front of a lot of
people.
Thank you again for reaching out with your website. It
changed my life. I know there have to be countless others who it has
helped too.
Sincerely, Jennifer
Dear Jennifer,
Thank you for taking the time to let me
know the site helped. Your story is inspiring and I'm always happy to hear
about people who are able to take the information presented and
constructively use it to improve your life and the lives of your
children.
My best wishes to you and yours for a
happy and healthy life ahead.
Dr. Irene
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